Facing Forward : A Life Reclaimed - Reba D + GIVEAWAY

I will be giving this book to someone who really needs it.  See the bottom of this post for details.

Summary:  Like so many women, I wanted a home, children, a loving husband, and a pet.  When life didn't work out the way I'd hoped by the time I was 30, I started to panic.  I was actively looking for love when I met a man who would ultimately change my life and the lives of those closest to me.

This story has a happy ending.  Unfortunately, not all victims of domestic violence are so fortunate.  There are steps you can take to free yourself or help free someone you know.  Through my story, you'll find out how.  You will walk away with a better understanding of how someone can lose everything to an abuser -- and when she is ready, reclaim her life.

What would ever make a woman settle for someone she knew in her heart wasn't right?  Worse, what would make her stay in an abusive marriage or relationship once she realized the truth?  A lot of things, among them, shame and fear.  Shame of leaving, shame of failure, fear of his retaliation, fear of personal marital details becoming public in a divorce proceeding -- and fear of suffering socially or financially by a divorce.  For some, there's the fear of being alone.  If you're unable to understand this, be thankful.  But also be careful.  Prior to my marriage to the pastor, I would never have tolerated anyone treating me this way.  (Summary from book - Image from www.mondialbooks.com  - Book given free for review)

My Review:  Facing Forward is a heartbreaking account of one woman's struggle to endure nearly two years of verbal and physical abuse at the hands of her husband. I warn you, this story is both compelling and disturbing. Once I picked it up, I could think of little else. I read it all in a day because I could not go to sleep without seeing the author safely out of her marriage.

Reba’s husband Philip is a seemingly dedicated Lutheran pastor, affectionate and attentive when he has an audience, but frightfully domineering and vindictive behind closed doors. Almost immediately after the wedding (and to be perfectly honest, even before it), Philip begins to insult Reba and berate her for the smallest of perceived offenses. To make matters worse, Philip's parents – who are, quite possibly, the most offensive, psychotic, and dysfunctional parents I have ever heard, seen, or read about – visit frequently and only uphold their son’s treatment of his wife. At first, Reba tries to stand up for herself, but when the verbal abuse escalates to the occasional physical confrontation, she discovers it is far easier to walk on eggshells and give in to her husband’s demands in order to keep the peace.

In Facing Forward, Reba acknowledges the red flags she missed, and those she simply ignored or rationalized away. From a outsider's perspective, it would be easy to see the same warning signs and say, "She's such an idiot. She should have seen it coming” or “There is no way I would have put up with that behavior. I would have left right away." However, the reality of abuse is always more complicated than it seems. Reba states "living in an abusive relationship can turn the most confident, secure, independent person into someone she never would have previously believed possible." Nowhere is this more evident than in Reba's own brief marriage as she transforms from an assertive, passionate woman to a fearful, desensitized submissive. Although Reba's situation deteriorated more quickly than most, such abuse is not uncommon. Her husband exhibited behavior typical of an abusive partner and it wasn’t long before she showed all the signs of being abused. It was only through her own determination and the loving support of family and friends that Reba was finally able to leave her husband and regain her sense of self-worth.

If I've learned anything from James Frey, Milli Vanilli, and the allegations currently swirling around Greg Mortenson, it is that sometimes people embellish the truth, pay lip service, or outright lie to make themselves look better. While it is true that there are always two people in a marriage and two sides to every story, I felt that Reba gave an honest portrayal of her marital woes. She was upfront about her own, relatively microscopic, failings in the marriage and accepted the blame for times when she erred, regardless of her husband's inexcusable behavior.

Facing Foward is a riveting narrative, but the author did not write it to entertain. She shared her story in the hope that it could serve as a wake-up call for someone currently living in an abusive relationship or lend some perspective to those trying to support a love one who is being abused. I recommend this book to everyone. Read it and you might recognize the signs. Read it and you might find the strength to leave.

My Rating: 4.25 Stars

For the sensitive reader: There were a handful of times in this book when the couple's sex life came into play. While I understand its relevance to their relationship and this book, I would have been okay with a little less detail. The pastor is also quite fond of profanity-laced tirades.

Sum it up: A compelling memoir of abuse and a life reclaimed.

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A Note from Reba:

For too long, domestic violence was something no one talked about in polite circles. But that didn't mean it didn't exist. Today, few people haven't been touched by it personally or known someone who has.  Today, we know longer accept it the way things have to be. We know we have choices, options and that help is available. As we continue to raise our social consciousness, we learn that it's only by facing this openly together that we can bring about the awareness that ultimately leads to change. If you know someone in need of help anywhere in the US, download a free state-by-state resource guide at http://www.facingforward-alifereclaimed.com/ 

__________________________________________

As of right now, this book has been claimed. 

You can buy your own copy of Facing Forward here or the Kindle edition (for $4.99) here.  

GIVEAWAY:  Because I feel that more people could benefit from this book, I will ship my copy to the first person* who contacts me at mindyoja AT hotmail DOT com.  Please only write if you are currently involved in or know someone who is involved in an abusive relationship.  Read it and, when you're through, pass it on.


*US residents only.  I can't afford to ship internationally.

Stick Figure - Lori Gottlieb

Summary:  That's when all the trouble started.  First of all, my long blond hair kept getting darker and darker until it finally turned brown.  I know it doesn't sound that terrible, but one of Mom's magazines said if you have "dishwater brown" hair, you should take that "boring" hair and make it more "exciting" by dyeing it red or platinum blond.  Then next to the article there were these pictures of three different ladies with brown, red, and blond hair.  The redhead and the blond lady were smiling like those people on game shows who win trips to Hawaii, but the lady with the brown hair looked like she was about to cry.  So now I'm stuck with hair that makes you cry.  But that's just part of what's happened to me since second grade.  Believe me, it gets a hundred times worse.  (Image from  http://www.harrywalker.com/ and summary from back of the book.)

My Review:  Like walking down a familiar and difficult path, this book brought back many harsh memories for me.  The difference was that I was seeing anorexia through the eyes of an anorexic and not as a bystander.  This book rang true--Lori's intelligence, control, disdain for others, her fixation on minor things, her skewed perception of herself and others and her desire to never grow up--because being a grown up is hard.  Reading this was almost deja vu but instead of watching it, it was almost as if I was living anorexia.  I'm amazed at the diary of this young girl and yet all her social commentaries fit my own experience.  Young girls are sent so many mixed messages but the most prevalent at the teen age is to be thin and sexy.  Sadly, Lori's story starts at the tender age of eleven.  The girls I knew dealing with this were thirteen and older.  I cannot fathom watching a pre-teen going through anorexia and becoming so thin.  The distortion she details is right on: anorexics literally cannot see themselves for what they really are physically.  Her stubbornness, although frightening, is reality for a girl suffering from an eating disorder.

What I'm not sure is portrayed accurately was her recovery.  She just decided one day that it was just too much work to be the thinnest.  I know that this was true for her case.  Or maybe it wasn't but the book needed to end and she needed to show how it truly is a decision on behalf of the sick and no one else.  I think it would be helpful for readers, as well as young girls dealing with an eating disorder, reading the book to know that for some recovery is long, painful process with ups and downs, something that for many never truly goes away.

I must applaud her epilogue.  Lori Gottlieb is honest, blunt, and doesn't sugar-coat the reality of what she sees--it's refreshing.  Her sentiments about our culture, the advertising in the USA are poisoning the minds of young girls and plague the minds of women.  And we often sit there and take it, embracing it for some, loathing it for others, but nonetheless simply accepting the messages that are sent.

If you're needing to understand an eating disorder and want to truly understand what it's about, this is a good first step.  It will help the reader understand it's not as simple as just taking a bite--it's a mindset that must be changed, a world that should be challenged when it sends such debilitating messages to young girls.

Rating: 4.5 Stars

Sum it up: An insiders look at teenage anorexia.

The Dirty Life : On Farming, Food, and Love - Kristin Kimball

Summary:  Single, thirty something, working as a writer in New York City, Kristin Kimball was living life as an adventure.  But she was beginning to feel a sense of longing for a family and for home.  When she interviewed a dynamic young farmer, her world changed...On an impulse, smitten if not yet in love, she shed her city self and moved to five hundred acres near Lake Champlain to start a new farm with him.  The Dirty Life is the captivating chronicle of their first year on Essex Farm , from the cold North Country winter through the following harvest season--complete with their wedding in the loft of the barn.

Kimball and her husband had a plan: to grow everything needed to feed a community.  It was an ambitious idea, a bit romantic, and it worked.  Every Friday evening, all year round, a hundred people travel to Essex farm to pick up their weekly share of the "whole diet"-- beef, pork, chicken, milk, eggs, maple syrup, grains, flours, dried beans, herbs, fruits, and forty different vegetables -- produced by the farm.  The work is done by draft horses instead of tractors, and the fertility comes from compost.  Kimball's vivid descriptions of landscape, food, cooking-- and marriage -- are irresistible. 

"As much as you transform the land by farming," she writes, "farming transforms you."  In her old life, Kimball would stay out till four a.m., wear heels, and carry a handbag.  Now she wakes up at four, wears Carhartts, and carries a pocketknife.  At Essex Farm, she discovers the wrenching pleasures of physical work, learns that good food is at the center of a good life, falls deeply in love, and finally finds the engagement and commitment she craved in the form of a man, a small town, and a beautiful piece of land.  (Summary from book - Image from amazon.com )

My Review:  Kristin Kimball never imagined herself on a farm, slaughtering pigs, planting beets, and driving a team of horses. When a chance interview leads to few days of grueling farm work, Kristin falls in love, first, with a way of life, and then with Mark – a farmer, who is equal parts eccentric, romantic, and world-class chef. Despite all good sense and the concerns of her family, Kristin moves to a ramshackle farm located on 500 acres of land in upstate New York, to cultivate a life of agricultural bliss with her soon-to-be husband.

The Dirty Life follows Kristin’s transformation from a single, freelance writer and devoted city slicker, to that of a wife, mother, and down-home farm girl.  In a fit of idealism, Kristin and Mark embark on an agricultural venture that, given their lack of capital, equipment, and expertise, has very little chance of success.  Their goal is to grow and eat their own food – all of it – and to give their community the same opportunity by building a cooperative, CSA-like farm that will provide members with a year-round, complete diet of organic fruit, vegetables, beef, chicken, pork, milk, eggs, butter, cheese, grain, dry beans, maple syrup, and more).  If that isn’t ambitious enough, they plan to do it all without chemical fertilizers or heavy-duty machinery.  Mark is determined.  Kristin is sure they are crazy.

After endless days of what Kristin calls, “trying to hammer out this big, awkward thing, [and] bring it from theory into being,” a farm begins to emerge from the dust and the wilds. It hobbles at first, and then it runs, as each week more members arrive at the farm, boxes in hand, to pick up their increasingly unlimited supply of food. While it was thrilling to watch the Kimball’s dream come true, it was Kristin’s description of the journey that I found most interesting – the successes, failures, and frustrations of living a life both gloriously simple and tremendously difficult.

Passionate and evocative, The Dirty Life had me at the prologue, with an irresistible blend of food, romance, and farm life that continued throughout the book. I was absorbed in the particulars of cooperative farming, the authors’ eloquent imagery, and unexpected sense of humor. I savored every page of it. Whether you are in love with country living, looking for a little inspiration, or just longing for a good book, The Dirty Life won’t disappoint you.

*POST EDIT* While I read the hardcover version of this book, the paperback version released April 12th, 2011, complete with recipes and photographs. *Yay!*

My Rating: 5 Stars

For the sensitive reader:  There were two moments of profanity and a few scenes of slaughter and gore that, though realistic in a farm setting, made my stomach a little squeamish. 

Sum it up:  A riveting agricultural love story that is compelling, realistic, and well worth your time.

The Immortal Life of Henrietta Lacks - Rebecca Skloot

Summary: Her name was Henrietta Lacks, but scientists know her as HeLa. She was a poor Southern tobacco farmer who worked the same land as her slave ancestors, yet her cells—taken without her knowledge—became one of the most important tools in medicine. The first “immortal” human cells grown in culture, they are still alive today, though she has been dead for more than sixty years. If you could pile all HeLa cells ever grown onto a scale, they’d weigh more than 50 million metric tons—as much as a hundred Empire State Buildings. HeLa cells were vital for developing the polio vaccine; uncovered secrets of cancer, viruses, and the effects of the atom bomb; helped lead to important advances like in vitro fertilization, cloning, and gene mapping; and have been bought and sold by the billions.

Yet Henrietta Lacks remains virtually unknown, buried in an unmarked grave.

Now Rebecca Skloot takes us on an extraordinary journey, from the “colored” ward of Johns Hopkins Hospital in the 1950s to stark white laboratories with freezers full of HeLa cells; from Henrietta’s small, dying hometown of Clover, Virginia—a land of wooden slave quarters, faith healings, and voodoo—to East Baltimore today, where her children and grandchildren live, and struggle with the legacy of her cells.

Henrietta’s family did not learn of her “immortality” until more than twenty years after her death, when scientists investigating HeLa began using her husband and children in research without informed consent. And though the cells had launched a multimillion-dollar industry that sells human biological materials, her family never saw any of the profits. As Rebecca Skloot so brilliantly shows, the story of the Lacks family—past and present—is inextricably connected to the dark history of experimentation on African Americans, the birth of bioethics, and the legal battles over whether we control the stuff we are made of.

Over the decade it took to uncover this story, Rebecca became enmeshed in the lives of the Lacks family—especially Henrietta’s daughter Deborah, who was devastated to learn about her mother’s cells. She was consumed with questions: Had scientists cloned her mother? Did it hurt her when researchers infected her cells with viruses and shot them into space? What happened to her sister, Elsie, who died in a mental institution at the age of fifteen? And if her mother was so important to medicine, why couldn’t her children afford health insurance?

Intimate in feeling, astonishing in scope, and impossible to put down, The Immortal Life of Henrietta Lacks captures the beauty and drama of scientific discovery, as well as its human consequences.
Summary from book, cover photo from indiebound.org

My Review: Chances are you have heard of Hela cells. They make regular appearances in articles and on news channels as scientists use them in research to discover how human cells react to various toxins and come up with new medications and vaccinations from studying them. But not much has been said about where these cells originated from. This book takes us behind the scenes of Hela cells back to the woman whose body they were cut from more than fifty years ago - Henrietta Lacks.

This book is more than a scientific study on Hela cells. It's a touching story of the Lacks family - a mother who died of cancer too early leaving her young children and husband behind. It's about the legacy of Henrietta Lacks, whose body passed on but whose cells not only still live but continue to reproduce at astonishing rates.

This book is perfectly laid out to create a beautiful, yet educational story. It contains some interesting information on chromosome mapping, cell reproduction, and cell research in general. The information is provided mostly in layman’s terms making it easy to understand and read. At the same time it brings light onto the woman who was Henrietta Lacks from her childhood to beyond her death with a detailed look inside the lives of her children. The author has done an amazing job of reporting as a neutral party (for the most part) and yet humanizing the Lackes. There were a few parts toward the middle that felt a bit over dramatized. Yet there is no doubt that Henrietta's children suffered greatly, especially her daughter, Deborah. Their torment is adequately portrayed.

This book will leave the reader puzzled with feelings on the equity of tissue ownership. Parts produce outrage toward the abuse of power by the medical profession, Yet where would we be without the medical advancements led to by Hela? What a miraculous legacy Henrietta left behind. This would certainly make for an excellent book club discussion with some warmer moments.

My Rating: 4 Stars

To Sum it Up: So much more than a scientific article yet so much more than a memoir, this is a book that begs to be read.

Bittersweet : Lessons from My Mother's Kitchen - Matt McAllester

Summary:  A well-seasoned foreign correspondent who had traveled to many of the globe's most dangerous hot spots, from Beirut to Baghdad, Kabul to Kosovo, Matt McAllester had been exposed to terror and tragedy on an epic scale.  But nothing he saw in wartime prepared him for the onslaught of grief he felt when his mother, a mere shadow of the elegant, vibrant woman she had once been, finally died.

In the months that followed, he found himself poring over old family photos and letters, trying to reach out for her.  But as he looked anew at her long-cherished collection of cookbooks, he realized that the best way to bring her back was through the food she had once prepared for him -- form her spare ribs to her scones to the homemade strawberry ice cream that seemed in memory the very essence of happy times.

With a reporter's precision and a storyteller's grace, McAllester has written a moving tribute to his mother and a dazzling feast for the senses.  Complete with recipes that evoke the pleasures of the past and the hopes for the future, Bittersweet is a memoir that weaves an unforgettable tale of family, food, and love.  (Summary from book - Image from goodreads.com )

My Review: Matt McAllester is a battle-hardened war correspondent and a man desperately broken by loss. Bittersweet is his story, and that of his mother, a woman who spent the final years of her life as a suicidal alcoholic with manic depressive episodes that drove even her closest family away. At her passing, Matt is overwhelmed by a sense of inconsolable sorrow, made worse by his own inability to have children, and eventually finds a form of solace in the kitchen, creating the meals his family shared in happier times.

While this book’s title and culinary premise create an obvious draw for a foodie like me, this novel is more than simple food lit. As the author attempts to resurrect his mother, at least in spirit, he begins to cook some of her favorite recipes and to remember life before her illness. With each taste of long forgotten dishes, he dredges up memories of their shared past and struggles to reconcile the idyllic scenes of his childhood with the turbulence of his adolescence and adult life. This mixture of recollections and recipes forms a genuinely tender opus to his mother -- a catalog of her life, for better or worse -- and follows the author’s gradual transformation into a more relaxed, self-sufficient, and satisfied human being.

Bittersweet feels like an accurate portrayal of the difficulties and heartbreak that come from mental illness. The author does not condemn his mother for the conflict caused by her infirmity, but strives to convey the complexities of their relationship in a realistic but respectful manner by highlighting both positive and negative memories. The result is a (pardon me, but there is no better word for it) bittersweet story of a man who learns to love his mother again, regardless of her debilitating disease. I enjoyed this book about as much as you can enjoy a book about mental illness -- the recipe/food sections didn’t hurt -- and thought it strangely uplifting in spite of the subject matter.

My Rating: 4 Stars

For the sensitive reader: There is some discussion of sex and occasional swearing (including several curses of the F variety). Also, this book might be difficult to read for anyone struggling with fertility or miscarriage. The author and his wife repeatedly attempt to conceive with little success. I’m not sure whether their experience would be cathartic or painful for someone in a similar situation, so be forewarned!

Sum it up: McAllester’s story is a poignant and unaffected memorial to his mother – one of recognition, acceptance, understanding, and love.

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Post edit: SPOILER: I just heard from Matt, via email, and he delighted me with the news that he and his wife had just adopted a little boy named Harry who will be turning one in February.  Best wishes to their little family from RFS!   I actually sighed with relief when I read the news.  Yay!!

Perfection : A Memoir of Betrayal and Renewal - Julie Metz

Summary:  Julie Metz had seemingly the perfect life--an adoring husband, a happy, spirited daughter, a lovely old house in a quaint suburban town--but it was all a lie.  Julie['s]...life changed forever on one ordinary January afternoon when her husband, Henry, collapsed on the kitchen floor and died in her arms.  Suddenly this mother of a six-year-old became the young widow in her bucolic small little town.  But that was only the begininng.  Seven months after Henry's death, just when Julie though she was emerging from the worst of it, came the rest of it.  Henry had hidden another life from her.

Perfection is the story of rebuilding both a life and an identity after betrayal and widowhood.  It is a story of rebirth and happiness--if not perfection.  (Summary from book - Image from http://www.amazon.ca/    - Book given free for review)

My Review:  Perfection is a novel that, like the grieving process, manifests in stages. At turns lyrical, raw, and profoundly emotional, Julie Metz begins with Fog, the story of her marriage to her enigmatic husband, Henry, and life with their precocious daughter, Liza. I was enthralled by Julie’s romantic writing style, Henry’s extravagant dinner parties, and their shared love for Liza. Yes, her life seemed nearly perfect, until the day it all fell apart.

When Henry dies suddenly, Julie’s grief is overwhelming and made worse when she inadvertently uncovers the secret that Henry managed to conceal throughout their marriage. Like Julie, I didn’t realize or anticipate the depth of Henry’s betrayal and was horrified on her behalf.

In Storm, the contrast in Metz’s writing style and emotional state is immediate and arresting. When Julie finds out what Henry has done, it shatters her rose-colored world and she retreats into a dark abyss of blinding sorrow and torrential rage. This section of the book contains graphic profanity and occasional stream-of-consciousness ranting, which, though distinctly unpleasant, accurately portrays the depth of Julie’s fury. If this were a fiction book, I would probably say that the profanity was unnecessary. However, Perfection is a memoir, and Julie is not a fictional character. While I found this section of the book difficult to read, I cannot fault Julie’s chosen form of expression. I would probably use several of those words myself, and with liberal application, if put in the same situation.

I will admit to being intensely relieved when Julie emerges from Storm into Wind. In my mind, wind has always signified change and, as Julie regains some of her former sanity, we see a new assertiveness emerge. Julie examines the past, cataloging all the missed signs and attempting to differentiate between the lies and the genuine moments of her life with Henry. Through a series of life changes and some dating trial-and-error, she begins to look toward the future – toward Daylight.

As the title might imply, the primary theme of this book is the idea of perfection -- what it meant to Julie, what it meant to Henry, why we struggle to capture it, and how we lose it. Through brief reference to the Japanese culinary concept of umami, or a savory perfection, Julie’s overall message seems to be that while life may not be perfect, we can each appreciate the individual moments of umami in our personal lives.

Perfection is a brutally honest portrayal of a life broken and rebuilt. However, I have read stories of maddening grief that raked me across the coals, emotionally. This one did not. I felt her pain, but not my own. While I wanted to love this novel, I could not convince myself to do more than sincerely admire the author’s writing style, her ability to convey emotion, and her willingness to share such an achingly personal experience.

My Rating: 3.75 Stars   For the sensitive reader: This book will likely offend those sensitive to profanity or somewhat graphic sexual descriptions and situations.

Sum it up: A poignant and savory novel that is more than the sum of its parts.

Mennonite in a Little Black Dress - Rhoda Janzen

Summary:  Not long after Rhoda Janzen turned forty, her world turned upside down.  It was bad enough that her husband of fifteen years left her for Bob, a guy he met on Gay.com, but that same week a car accident left her seriously injured.  Needing a place to rest and pick up the pieces of her life, Rhoda packed her bags, crossed the country, and returned to her quirky Mennonite family's home, where she was welcomed back with open arms and offbeat advice.  (Rhoda's good-natured mother suggested she get over her heartbreak by dating her first cousin--he owned a tractor, see.)

Written with wry humor and huge personality--and tackling faith, love, family, and aging--Mennonite in a Little Black Dress is an immensely moving memoir of healing, certain to touch anyone who has ever had to look homeward in order to move ahead.  (Summary from back of the book, book free for review, and image from  http://peacoat.typepad.com/)

My Review:  I'm sorry to say I was disappointed by this book. I wanted it to be funny. The title and the cover were very eye catching. The story wasn't that engaging, nor was the humor. I did feel empathy for her, her chain of events that led to her sad return to her hometown. That didn't change the fact that I felt she attacked her own family heartlessly and the very people who raised her. I realize she rejected her upbringing, but to so blatantly bash them in such a public way seemed cruel. 

There were other aspects to the book that I didn't enjoy, specifically the blindness to her husband's verbal abuse and cruelty, her stuck-up attitude about her education and how it implied that people who are religious couldn't be educated as well because the two don't coincide (in her eyes), and those are just to name a few. Her organization was all over the place too. You'd be following her story and then a random anecdote would be thrown in...because the author wanted to share some funny-to-her story? I'm not totally sure the purpose of some of her side tangents. The last few chapters seemed to be redeeming, but then the very last chapter dashed that effort. It was a doozey. I couldn't get past the fact that her mother so openly welcomed her daughter home again (and had done so many times over) only to be openly mocked and ridiculed in a nationally ranked and read book. I can't say I'd recommend the book to my friends, but I also wouldn't discourage it. 

Rating: 2 Stars  For the sensitive reader: there are a couple sections with some serious swearing and a definite swear word that most would find highly offensive.

Sum it up: Critical and crass, this book left me disappointed and not enlightened about Mennonite life.

Musical Chairs - Jen Knox

Summary: Musical Chairs is candid, darkly humorous and wholly engaging. Taking place in Ohio, this gripping memoir recounts the story of a runaway girl and the family that stood by her.

After being struck by a severe panic disorder in 2003, Jen begins to explore her past. In doing so, she becomes enamored by the mysterious nature of her family's history. She discovers a pattern of mental health diagnoses and searches to define the cusp between her '90s working-class childhood and the trouble of adapting to a comfortable life in the suburbs.

Inspired by the least likely source, the family she left behind, Jen attempts to reconcile with this past. She reflects upon years of strip-dancing, alcoholism, and estrangement while maintaining impressive narrative control. This story is about identity, class, family ties, and the elusive nature of mental illness.
Summary from book, cover photo from amazon.com, book received free for review

My Review: Jen Knox neatly weaves the tale of her coming-to-age years within the pages of Musical Chairs. Jen struggles to find her identity and in the process makes some difficult choices, including leaving home at a young age and stripping to support herself. The title, Musical Chairs, is fitting as Jen finds the mental illness within her family tree comes full circle. Reliving these painful moments while writing this book had to be heart-wrenching. The manner in which the author takes full responsibility for her own mistakes is refreshing.

Though overall Jen's tale is not incredibly remarkable her depiction of it is. Lancaster's beautiful writing style keeps the reader engaged. Her raw emotion is fully captured within these pages. Though this tale feels as if it were written for the purpose of providing some personal closure, it's end result is a true work of art as it showcases Jen's extraordinary writing talent. She is currently working on her first fiction novel which I will quickly snatch up as I am quite certain it will be delicious.

My Rating: 3.5 Stars Sensitive readers - this story contains sex, drugs and some choice language.

To Sum it up: A healing memoir from a promising new writer.

Broken Birds : The Story of My Momila - Jeannette Katzir

Summary: Channa will evade Nazi Soldiers and survive WWII by the age of twelve. The consequences will be that her 5 children will fight for their own survival with---each other.

World War II has long since ended, and yet Jaclyn and her four brothers and sisters grow up learning to survive it. Having lived through the Holocaust on the principle of constant distrust, their mother, Channa, dutifully teaches her children to cling to one another while casting a suspicious eye to the outside world. When Channa dies, the unexpected contents of her will force her adult children to face years of suppressed indignation. For Jaclyn and her siblings, the greatest war will not be against strangers, but against one another. Broken Birds, The Story of My Momila is Jeannette Katzir's achingly honest memoir of the enduring effects of war. From her parents' harrowing experiences during the Holocaust to her own personal battles, Katzir exposes maladies of heart and mind that those broken by war, inevitably and unintentionally pass down to the generations that follow. (Summary from back of the book and image from http://levinejudaica.com/ - Book given free for review)

My Review: I received this book free for review--free books rock! I've been pondering how to explain my thinking about this book and have come up with this analogy. Although I realize it probably fits best with my experience, I'm sure some of you will understand my meaning. Reading Broken Birds, The Story of My Momila is like running a marathon. You're glad you did it. It was long. It took dedication and hard work, but at least for me, I'll never do it again. It was painful. Too painful to want to read a second time. There were many times I wanted to put it down because the fighting between the siblings was just so sad and depressing I didn't want to know how it could get worse...and you know it's supposed to get worse because it says so in the opening chapter. It seems so awful that siblings would fight so bitterly. Their relationships are so horrible because of their own actions, and yet they still can't seem to stop. Maybe I'm alone in my desire to not read things that make me sad, but that is truthfully the reason I didn't give this book a higher rating than 3.5. Am I glad I read it? Yes. Have I learned a lot from it? Yes. But, you know my thoughts on the matter.

I've read books about Holocaust survivors, but I have never read a book about how their trauma affected their families post war. This book explores their broken lives in great detail and how it ruined or almost ruined their children's lives. I learned quite a bit. In fact, detail is something Jeannette Katzir does very well. I liked her writing style; it lures me in and has a nice pace. Because of this, I had the hardest time separating the book from what I kept picturing was an exact depiction of her life. I knew it wasn't the case, and yet I found myself again and again thinking she was Jaclyn. This is evidence of her ability to make the story so real. The details did, at times, start to feel a bit overdone. Although I can't help but wonder if this was the author's intent--it does help make the impression that everything was quite painful (therefore achieving her purpose). I also learned more about Jewish culture and customs. It was interesting to read about the strict Jewish characters and compare them to the more relaxed characters. I don't have any close personal friends who are Jewish, so I felt like I was getting a glimpse into the modern Jewish world I've never had the chance to see.

I do believe there is a valuable lesson to either be learned or reinforced from reading this book: try not to pass your emotional baggage onto your children. This is easier said than done, but a good reminder nonetheless.

I would recommend this book to anyone who wants to learn more about the survivors of the Holocaust, those interested in Jewish history, those interested in post-war trauma and its effects on families, and anyone who simply wants more information about WWII from a different perspective. It is a fairly clean read with very little swearing although there is one f-bomb (maybe a handful of times with the others).

Rating: 3.5 Stars--because it was just so painful.

Sum it up: A detailed depiction of the myriad of ways WWII damaged the people who lived through it and how they unintentionally damaged their own children.

True Story : Murder, Memoir, Mea Culpa - Michael Finkel

Summary: In True Story: Murder, Memoir, Mea Culpa, disgraced New York Times writer Michael Finkel recounts the story of the murderer who assumed his identity and examines the reasons for his own fall from journalistic grace, in a memoir that is gripping, perceptive, and bizarre. In 2002, Finkel, a rising star at the Times, was fired for fabricating a character in a story about child laborers in Africa. Just as the story of his downfall was about to become public, he learned that a man named Christian Longo, arrested in Mexico for the murder of his wife and three small children in Oregon, had been living under an assumed identity: Michael Finkel of The New York Times. Sensing a story--and an opportunity for redemption--Finkel contacted Longo, initiating a relationship that would grow increasingly complex over the course of Longo's trial and conviction. (Summary taken from amazon.com reviewer Erica Barnett)

My Review: This is a prime example of turning lemons into lemonade. Imagine being caught in a lie that destroys your career at the exact same moment that your identity is stolen by a murder...not a good day. Unless you can get the only interviews with said murderer and write a book about it.

The bizarre fact that both stories parallel each other makes for a well organized story and an interesting study of the similarity and differences between the two "main characters." (It is a non-fiction, are there still main characters?) Essentially it presents a spectrum of narcissism and lets you wonder where you fall. Not surprisingly the author tries hard to present himself as a penitent man hoping to return to good graces, with the understanding that having been branded, professionally, as a liar we have no reason to believe him. This is a book you want to discuss with a psychologist (we had one in our book club at the time) for real insight into various pathologies, including your own. (Yikes.)

The subject matter, the gruesome murder of a woman and her children, is presented in a factual reporter-like way. It was neither sensationalized nor sanitized. I was nervous about reading it, and it is horrifying to think that anyone could do that to their family, but it didn't give me nightmares or cause me to distrust mankind.

**Sidenote: If you like this book you'd probably like "Devil in a White City" by Erik Larson and maybe "In Cold Blood" by Truman Capote.

My Rating: 4 stars

In one sentence: If you tell a big lie, write a parallel story about a murderer and you'll come out smelling like roses.

Musings on Minutiae - Weston Locher

Summary: Humorous Essays, Anecdotes, & Childhood Memories

Welcome to Weston Locher's Musings on Minutiae where the author offers up hilarious observations and insights on topics of great importance such as...

Living in an urban apartment complex - "...if I become an admitted pet owner, then I have to pay not only a several hundred dollar deposit to the apartment complex, but I'm pretty sure that they also reserve the right to harvest some of my bodily organs..."

Living with felines - "...as I'm walking anywhere in my apartment. They scamper in front of my legs, causing me to fall and face plant into whatever furniture is closest. They especially like to play this game when I'm carrying piping hot coffee."

Childhood Memories - "Our family was nearly torn apart on several occasions by arguments started when the refrigerator door was open for what my father deemed as 'too long.'"

Chock full of humorous essays and personal anecdotes, Musings on Minutiae will keep you laughing for as long as you have a pulse.
cover photo from http://musingsonminutiae.com and summary from the back of the book

My Review: I was thrilled to receive this book comprised of short, humorous tales free for review. Within this small publication, Locher finds humor in everything from childhood to work to relationships to apartment living and even his pets. It promises to keep the reader laughing.

Musings on Minutiae is composed of several types of comedy. There are those stories that are easy to relate to leaving the reader laughing out loud. While other tales are more the "you-had-to-have-been-there" variety which merely induce a smile. Sprinkled throughout are everyday accounts in which witty Weston is able to portray immense amounts of humor by skewing the angle. Life's most mundane moments would be delightfully entertaining with Weston Locher around.

This book is ideal when consumed in small doses. The three to five page chapters make this the perfect bathroom book. Just don't be surprised when you hear chuckling behind that closed door.

My Rating: 3.5 Stars

To Sum it up: A fun, easy read guaranteed to leave you with a smile.

Eat My Globe : One Year to Go Everywhere and Eat Everything - Simon Majumdar

Summary: When Simon Majumdar hit forty, he realized there had to be more to life than his stable but uninspiring desk job. As he wondered how to escape his career, he rediscovered a list of goals he had scrawled out years before, the last of which said: Go everywhere, eat everything. With that, he had found his mission--a yearlong search for the delicious, and curious, and the curiously delicious, which he names Eat My Globe and memorably chronicles in these pages.

In Majumdar's world, food is everything. Like every member of his family, he has a savant's memory for meals, with instant recall of dishes eaten decades before. Simon's unstoppable wit and passion for all things edible (especially those things that once had eyes, and a face, and a mom and pop) makes this an armchair traveler's and foodie's delight--Majumdar does all the heavy lifting, eats the heavy foods (and suffers the weighty consequences), so you don't have to. He jets to thirty countries in just over twelve months, diving mouth-first into local cuisines and cultures...

The meat of the story...is the friends that Simon makes as he eats. They are as passionate about food as he is and are eager to welcome him into their homes and tables, share their choicest meals, and reveal their local secrets. (Summary from book jacket - Image from eatmyglobe.blogspot.com )

My review: At 40 years old, Simon Majumdar was faced with a lack luster job and, to his abject horror, a declining ability to move urinal cakes. Can you say “impending mid-life crisis”? Eat My Globe is the expression of one man’s desire to eat truly amazing food as it was meant to be prepared -- pad thai in Thailand, Texan barbecue, Japanese sushi, Argentine steaks, and countless other less-famous-but-local fare from around the world.

Eat My Globe was an impressive combination of my three favorite things to do - read, eat, and travel. The first two I do well enough on my own, but for the last few weeks I have opted to travel vicariously along with Simon as he flew, walked, and ate his way around the globe. Flat out obsessed with all things culinary, Simon enjoys the pleasures of a well-prepared meal and thinks nothing of licking his fingers or, indeed, his entire plate in the middle of a crowded restaurant. I couldn’t help but love Simon for his tactless and unapologetic way of expressing his opinions to anyone within earshot. His self-deprecating sense of humor and clever phrasing provided not only an entertaining read, but also a fascinating account of the meals he ate in gluttonous hobbit-style.

I was both horrified and delighted by the food that Simon willingly consumed. It would have been much easier for him to say he was going to eat only the world’s best food, but instead he chose to eat everything, devouring lamb’s head, tripe, and tongue dumplings with relish. While our taste in food might not always align (I will always prefer pizza to veal brains for the simple reason that I will never ever try veal brains), I can’t help but admire his spirit and sheer nerve.

If I could describe books as well as Simon describes food, then I would be a world-class reviewer and a kazillionaire. His imagery had me chuckling, salivating, or near retching on practically every page. I almost hurled reading about his encounters with stir fried rat, rotten shark meat, and cod sperm sushi and actually hurt myself laughing at his account of the discovery of a breaded, deep fried banana. Seriously, I think I pulled a muscle.

While Eat My Globe, doesn’t really have a deep plot or existential message to share, I adored my time with it. The chapters aren’t very long (though there are many), which makes it conveniently easy to put the book down, fix something to tasty to eat, and then come back to it without feeling disconnected from the story. I’m not entirely certain that Simon learned a great deal from his journey across the globe, however, what I experienced was an often humorous, occasionally gross, but mostly delicious account of his exotic tastes and travels.

My Rating: 4.5 Stars. For the sensitive reader, there are occasional moments of crassness and profanity. Also, if you have a problem with gluttony this book probably is not your bag.

Sum it up: A sarcastic, savory travelogue that leaves you hungry for more…and willing to eat almost anything. Sure to be a hit with the food lit crowd.

American On Purpose : The Improbable Adventures of an Unlikely Patriot - Craig Ferguson

Summary: In America on Purpose, Craig Ferguson delivers a moving and achingly funny memoir of living the American dream as he journeys from the mean streets of Glasgow, Scotland, to the comedic promised land of Hollywood. Along the way he stumbles through several attempts to make his mark--as a punk rock musician, a construction worker, a bouncer, and, tragically, a modern dancer.

To numb the pain of failure, Ferguson found comfort in drugs and alcohol, addictions that eventually led to an aborted suicide attempt. (He forgot to do it when someone offered him a glass of sherry.) But his story has a happy ending: in 1993 the washed-up Ferguson washed up in the United States. Finally sober, he landed a breakthrough part on the hit sitcom The Drew Carey Show, a success that eventually led to his role as the host of CBS's The Late Late Show. By far Ferguson's greatest triumph was his decision to become a U.S. citizen, a milestone he achieved in early 2008, just before his command performance of the president at the White House Correspondents' Association Dinner. In American on Purpose, Craig Ferguson talks a red, white, and blue streak about everything our Founding Fathers feared. (Summary and Image from amazon.com and amazon.ca.com)

My Review: I received this book from my mother-in-law at Christmas. I thought it odd that she picked this up for me. As far as I know the only person to know about my obsession with Craig Ferguson is.......me. But, I played it down to my husband. "I don't know why she thought I would like that. Maybe she knows I have a thing for sexy Scotsmen with heavy accents?". Secretly I could not wait to dive in.

For those of you that don't know who Craig Ferguson is--google him. To make a long story short, he is the host of The Late Late Show, and a particularly naughty character if I may.

Through his book he takes us from his childhood home of Glasgow, to the gritty streets of New York City, the street fairs of Edinburgh, the aspiring artists nooks of London, and back again. He takes us through so many painful times, through love and loss, as he tries and tries and tries to break through the barrier and become the person he wants to be.

Heroine, cocaine, alcohol addiction, stand up comedy, construction work, and the creation of Bing Hitler. Through three marriages, and what seems like a lifetime of doubt, Ferguson takes you into his life and his mind with his "Improbable Adventures". By the last chapters you will be clapping and cheering for this underdog who, against all odds, made it to where he wants to be.

I look forward to reading his novel soon. I love his irreverence and shameless comedy-- and his super hot red white and blue kilt.

My Rating: 5 stars. For those sensitive to profanity-- He is from Scotland. It is there in force.

Sum it up: A uplifting read.

Stitches : a Memoir - David Small

Summary: One day David Small awoke from a supposedly harmless operation to discover that he had been transformed into a virtual mute. A vocal cord removed, his throat slashed and stitched together like a bloody boot, the fourteen-year-old boy had not been told that he had cancer and was expected to die.

In Stitches, Small, the award-winning children's illustrator and author, recreates this terrifying event in a life story that might have been imagined by Kafka. As the images painfully tumble out, one by one, we gain a ringside seat at a Gothic family drama, where David — a highly anxious yet supremely talented child—all too often became the unwitting object of his parents' buried frustration and rage.

Believing, as most parents do, that they were trying to do the best, David's parents, in fact, did just the reverse: Edward Small, a Detroit physician, who vented his own anger by hitting a punching bag in the family's basement, was convinced that he could cure his little son by shooting him up with heavy doses of radiation, yet with near deadly results; while David's mother, Elizabeth, a tyrannically stingy and excessively scolding parent, ran the Small household under a cone of silence where emotions, especially her own, were hidden.

Depicting this coming-of-age story with dazzling, kaleidoscopic images that render nightmare in a form that becomes a fairytale in itself, Small tells us of his journey from sickly child, to cancer patient, to troubled teen, whose risky decision to run away from home at 16 — with nothing more than the dream of becoming an artist — would become the ultimate survival statement.

A silent movie masquerading as a book, Stitches is as much a memoir as a tale of redemption that informs us that things can get better, that good can emerge from evil, and that art has the power to transform. It is a both a profound gift and a remarkable achievement, a book that renders a broken world suddenly seamless and beautiful again.
Cover photo and summary courtesy of http://stitches.davidsmallbooks.com/

My Review: This is an unusual book in that it is made up completely of sketches in comic book form. What a perfect way to tell the story of a boy who loses control over his vocal cords at a young age due to cancer. Pictures say more than words possibly could. These illustrations capture the frustration and sadness, fear and helplessness of a young boy. They do a fantastic job of showing the child's perspective, something many memoirs lack.

The book is at once both heartbreaking and powerful. It is a mix of sweet and fearful memories, a splendid blend of fantasy and reality. It's the story of a boy suffering from neglect and on the verge of abuse who, with the aid of a caring psychiatrist, learns the strength he has inside himself. A painful story, yet one that is beautifully told.

The entire book takes less than an hour to read yet it's message is timeless. The obstacles that David Small overcame to become the man he now is are amazing. Drifting towards destruction, David Small found the courage to move on and make something out of his life - an unsung hero. His strength is very inspirational. This is one you should not miss.

My Rating: 5 Stars

Sum it up: A remarkable tale of strength and courage flawlessly rendered.

The New York Regional Mormon Singles Halloween Dance : A Memoir - Elna Baker

This review comes to us from guest contributor, Melissa Mc., over at Gerbera Daisy Diaries. Melissa Mc (aka Gerbera Daisy Mom) is a mother of 3; wife of 1; daughter, sister, friend, aunt; lover of football, politics, food, travel, walking, theatre and all things literary. She’s without talent in most normal Mormon activities – she doesn’t paint, sew, craft, scrapbook or quilt. She can be found in front of the TV during every March Madness college basketball tournament and on every Saturday during college football season. Her youngest was born with a congenital heart defect and had open heart surgery at 5 weeks. She knows more about Children’s Hospitals than she ever wanted too. And when she grows up, she wants to be the first female commissioner of the NFL.

Summary: It's lonely being a Mormon in New York City. So once again, Elna Baker attends the New York Regional Mormon Singles Halloween Dance-a virgin in a room full of virgins doing the Macarena. Her Queen Bee costume, which involves a black funnel stuck to her butt for a stinger, isn't attracting the attention she'd anticipated. So once again, Elna is alone at the punch bowl, stocking up on generic Oreos, exactly where you'd expect to find a single Mormon who's also a Big Girl. But loneliness is nothing compared to what happens when she loses eighty pounds. . . . and falls in love with an atheist.The New York Regional Mormon Singles Halloween Dance is the memoir of a girl who distresses her family when she chooses NYU over BYU. A girl who's cultivating an oxymoronic identity as a bold, educated, modern, funny, proper, abstinent, religious stand-up comic, equal parts wholesome and hot. As Elna test-drives her identity, she finds herself in the strangest scenarios including selling creepy, overpriced dolls to petulant children at FAO Schwarz and dressing a head wound with a maxi pad while on a date. (summary from amazon.com - image from goodreads.com)

My review: For anyone who has experienced an LDS (Latter-day Saint) church dance, they are on the spectrum of the cheesiest thing you have ever participated in to the most magical experience of your life (however, I’ve only experienced the former and I really don’t think the latter exists). Elna Baker uses the reality of church dances as the framework for her memoir, The New York Regional Mormon Singles Halloween Dance. This infamous dance is now probably the single most popular activity in all the church!

As a LDS member who has chosen NYU over BYU, Elna tries to balance two worlds: One of devout Latter-day Saint member, the other of artistic, educated, attractive young woman. Throughout the memoir we are given intimate access to Elna’s struggles: her struggles with weight, her struggles with faith, her struggles with morality and her struggles with employment. Along the ride we meet her atheist boyfriend and love of her life, “Matt,” her member boyfriend and almost fiancé, “Hayes,” and “Warren Beatty” with whom she almost has a one night stand.

Elna is an extremely talented writer. Her personal vignettes are tragic and hysterical all at the same time. She is an unexpected missionary – discussing sometimes difficult church doctrine with ease and straightforwardness and recognizes the “elephant in the room” when talking about doctrine that may seem weird to others. She is truly brave by allowing so many millions to read about her moral trespasses. I probably shouldn’t air my dirty laundry in a book review – but at times, this was a very painful book to read – I had similar experiences as a single adult (and sometimes inactive) member of the church. It was often a difficult process. I wish I could recreate my single years in such a humorous and redemptive fashion!

Thank you Elna, for sharing your life, knowledge, maturation and discoveries with us. And thank you for giving me back my reading mojo!

My Rating: 4 stars. Language and mild sexual situations.

A warning for the reader: Elna is very descriptive when describing her “flings.” She doesn’t mince words and doesn’t sugar coat her internal battles. Nor does she shy away from language that some might find inappropriate – especially for a member of the church. I, however, appreciated her candor and felt she was being true to herself. Others may not feel the same way.

Sum it up: Funny LDS woman and her search for balance and faith.

Bitter Is The New Black - Jen Lancaster

Also reviewed by Mindy.

Summary: This is a story of how a haughty former sorority girl went from having a household income of almost a quarter-million dollars to being evicted from a ghetto apartment... It's a modern Greek tragedy, as defined by Roger Dunkle in The Classical Origins of Western Culture: a story in which "the central character, called a tragic protagonist or hero, suffers some serious misfortune which is not accidental and therefore meaningless, but is significant in that the misfortune is logically connected." In other words? [She] had it coming. (Summary from back of the book and image from Powells.com)

My Review: If you don't mind a little profanity, you'll enjoy this book. She is hilarious--profane, but hilarious!

Jen has a transformation in the book, which is what eventually endeared her to the me. In the beginning I was having a hard time feeling connected to her: she has everything. A high rise, modern penthouse, shoes from brand names I've only looked at in New York, purses for every occasion again by designers I've only read about, she sees a hairdresser that is only part of a one-stop pamper yourself shop, a boyfriend who actually agreed to her Jen Commandments, I mean, seriously? This is only possible in fiction from my experience. That and the fact that she gets away with her insults without any repercussions; it's too good to be true.

Then you witness her house of cards go tumbling down. And she's right. At the beginning you think she had it coming. As you read of her dedicated efforts to right her situation you start to feel sincere sympathy for her and for her boyfriend, Fletch. By the end of the book I had a deep respect for her integrity and I could relate to her humbling experience, something I think is a universal human experience.

There were a couple parts in the book I was laughing out loud. 1) The Jen Commandments--seriously she couldn't have described my feelings about cooking better. And 2) The marathon convention she has to attend as a favor for a good friend. Her self-deprecating humor is endearing and her snarky zingers are what I've always wanted to say, but either don't think of at the time or don't have the guts to ever really say to anyone. Be forewarned: don't read this if you don't like swearing--she's a potty-mouthed trucker. Still...SO funny!

My Rating: 4.5 stars. I almost gave it 5 stars, but didn't because the swearing was a bit overboard for me.

Sum it up: Insanely witty, brutally honest, a bit crass, but overall entertaining read.

Escape - Carolyn Jessop

Summary: When she was eighteen years old, Carolyn Jessop was coerced into an arranged marriage with a total stranger: a man thirty-two years her senior. Merril Jessop already had three wives...Over the next fifteen years, Carolyn had eight children and withstood her husband's psychological abuse and the watchful eyes of his other wives who were locked in a constant battle for supremacy.

Carolyn's every move was dictated by her husband's whims....For in the FLDS, a wife's compliance with her husband determined how much status both she and her children held in the family. Carolyn was miserable for years and wanted out, but she knew that if she tried to leave and got caught, her children would be taken away from her. No woman in the country had ever escaped from the FLDS and managed to get her children out, too. But in 2003, Carolyn chose freedom over fear and fled her home with her eight children. She had $20 to her name. (Review from publishers comments via Powells.com

My Review: Incredible.

The bad kind of incredible.

I couldn't tear myself away from the story of the raid on the FLDS polygamist ranch in Texas last April. My heart ached, both at the thought of those poor little girls being married off to old men, and at the fear and confusion all the children must have felt when they were taken from their families. I could understand the community's horror and having their temple searched just as I could understand the reasons the authorities search it. At the time I had a negative opinion of polygamy, especcially within these extreme communities, yet I still allowed for a bit of "let them believe what they want, I'll believe what I want" to exist in my thoughts. But just a bit - because the fact is, 16 year old girls should not be married to 50 year old men.

Then I read this book and got a first hand account of what an 18 year old thinks when she is married to a 54 year old man in a lightening quick ceremony. I read about a system that not just allows the hitting of a child, but encourages it. I read about good people, thinking they are doing God's will, who became pawns of men with too much power and no authority.

Mostly I read about a woman who was treated as property, as a cheap tradable commodity. About a "family" where many of the sister-wives developed mental illnesses as a result of severe mental, physical, and sexual abuse.

The story Carolyn tells is of the extreme end of the spectrum (though I imagine there are easily far worse stories to be found in the FLDS community) and certainly there are functional and happy polygamist families. Aside from polygamy alone, this book illustrates cult mentality, the corruption that comes from power and the real cultural sickness caused when women (and by extension families)are degraded. I still believe the general principle that consenting adults should have the legal right to exersice their religious beliefs. But in this community that is not part of the process. The people, men and women are taught that they don't have the right to say no to their leaders. Coersion by fear is not consent.

This book had a number of aspects that affected me personally. I cringed when Carolyn described the reaction that people in the nearby "normal" community had when the polygamists came to town. I lived in that town, I was the reaction she described (the curious stares and the name calling, not the rock throwing).

As a Mormon (the FLDS are a group that broke from the LDS, or Mormon church, in the late 1800s, they have some similar beliefs and mindsets...and some that are vastly different) it made me think twice about some of my beliefs. I can see how some of my thoughts are on the same spectrum as those that have turned corrupt within the FLDS and especcially made me aware that some of my assumptions about authority need to be tempered by my belief in personal revelation and agency.

My rating: 4 stars. If you are interested in the subject matter this is a book you worth reading. Also worth reading to see that severe gender-inequality exists in our free country and worth reading to understand why not treating women, men, and families with respect can become devestating to a culture.

In one sentence: Carolyn Jessop tells a story of a community that is odd to begin with and becomes (pardon my non- eloquence) more and more messed up as the story unfolds.

Lucky - Alice Sebold

Summary: When Alice Sebold, author of the best-selling novel, The Lovely Bones , was completing her freshmen year at Syracuse University, she was assaulted and raped. Years after the fact, Sebold wrote this memoir about the rape and its aftermath. The book's title, "Lucky," is explained in the prologue: the police told Sebold that she was lucky to have escaped the fate of another girl who had been murdered and dismembered in the same spot. In point of fact, Sebold, a virgin before the rape, was in a sense murdered, since life as she had known it would never be the same: "My life was over; my life had just begun"( Summary courtesy of the Literature, Art, and Medicine database. Photo: amazon).

My Review: Back in 2006 I read the Lovely Bones by Sebold. I was extremely disappointed and quite disturbed by the content. It was not until Kari posted her review about the novel that I even thought about the author again. I picked up Lucky the other day, read the back of it and realized the author was someone I had previously read, and not enjoyed. But the storyline caught me and the fact that it was a memoir excited me, so I, somewhat reluctantly, purchased it and came straight home to dive in.

I really enjoyed my time with this book.

Sebold takes you from the forefront of a violent crime committed against her, to the depths of the legal system, as well of the depths of a young woman's soul. Starting with the gruesome scene of Sebold's attack, she seems to pick her words skillfully, giving great detail, but also not scaring you off from the rest of the book. The thoughts that she has, mimic those that you imagine yourself feeling were this to happen to you--doubt, misery, putting on the "brave face" to give your loved ones reassurance. Any one of these emotions brings the experience to life.

I cannot tell much. It is a novel that you cannot do justice by yakking about how it affected you. But two parts stand out to me. Two parts that have been echoing in my head since I read them. At this particular point Alice has just turned to see her friends African -American boyfriend looking at her with concern:

"He was black, wasn't he?" Victor asked. He was trying to get me to look at him. Right at him.
"Yes."
"I'm sorry," he said. He was crying. The tears ran slowly down the outside of his cheeks." I'm so sorry."
I don't know whether I hugged him because I could not stand to see him crying, or because I was prompted.....He held me until I had to pull away, and then he let me go.He was miserable and I cannot even now imagine what was going on in his head.Perhaps he knew that relatives and strangers would say things to me like "I bet he was black," and so he wanted to counter this, some experience in the same twenty four hours that would make me resist placing people in categories and aiming at them my full on hate.

I am not sure why this part in particular was so intense for me. But it was. The other was:

"You save yourself or you remain unsaved."

I was inspired by her courage in seeing the whole thing through, even when the legal system tricked her and ran her through the coals. She gives you insights in to her inner weaknesses and the outer facades she provides to get justice for the man who raped her.

She takes you through the turmoil that soon engulfs her life, and her path back--something I readily identified with. Friends that are good and friends that are not so good emerge, and she brings them each to life flawlessly.

Truly exceptional. I plan to pick up The Lovely Bones again soon, now that I am a little older and perhaps have more insight into this authors writing.

My Rating: 4 Stars

Sum it up: Disturbing and inspiring, a work of bravery.

The Good Good Pig - Sy Montgomery

Summary: “Christopher Hogwood came home on my lap in a shoebox. He was a creature who would prove in many ways to be more human than I am.” --From The Good Good Pig.

A naturalist who spent months at a time living on her own among wild creatures in remote jungles, Sy Montgomery had always felt more comfortable with animals than with people. So she gladly opened her heart to a sick piglet who had been crowded away from nourishing meals by his stronger siblings. Yet Sy had no inkling that this piglet, later named Christopher Hogwood, would not only survive but flourish–and she soon found herself engaged with her small-town community in ways she had never dreamed possible. Unexpectedly, Christopher provided this peripatetic traveler with something she had sought all her life: an anchor (eventually weighing 750 pounds) to family and home. (From back of book)

My Review: When my book club host for July picked a book titled “The Good Good Pig,” well the jokes ran rampant for a few minutes. I mean really, the story of the extraordinary life of a pig? Didn’t we all read this in elementary school? Let me guess, there is a spider, and a rat… It seemed a bit too silly for the likes of us (haughty indignation). “Oh, don’t worry” the host said, “it’s a true story AND was featured on NPR”. With those magic words we all settled down to read the book. (Although the last book I chose based on an NPR recommendation was a big disappointment.)

Within the first three chapters I was ready to adopt a pig and raise it like as my child (though to be honest I changed my mind once the pig topped 400 lbs).

Like many memoirs this book had a predictable rhythm. This one was: educational anecdotes from around the world, involving either pigs, or other animals encountered in the authors extensive travels, then a tie into the life of Chris the Pig, and his family. I enjoyed both the anecdotes and the running narrative because they were interesting and uplifting. There were some aspects of the author’s story that I raised an eyebrow at, mostly in regards to how she claimed to like, and relate to, animals better than humans (which seems like reverse discrimination to me), but overall the story was one of love and respect between family, neighbors and the entire animal kingdom.

Who could object to that?

Some of the members of my book club thought the book was too slow moving to enjoy. But I thought it had a nice relaxing pace with a plot that doesn’t suffer if read in bits and pieces. I’d recommend keeping the book in the car for those random moments of waiting; by the bedside for winding down at night; or, as was my case, to pick up every two hours while feeding an infant. (Although I will warn you, that nursing a baby while reading about the a sow laying on her side feeding her young is a bit…er…close to home.)

My rating: 4 stars

In one sentence: The grown-up version of Charlotte's Web, minus the spider. (Thank heavens!)